Dear BFF

The stereotype is that all married women have to watch their single friends for fear they’ll try to snatch their husbands. The belief is that us single girls are mortally envious of the “luck” our married friends have,  and will do anything to make that luck ours. 
In actual fact, mami, I’m the one pulling up tired excuses to avoid being around you and your darling hubby.  I always knew he was a wild one but he made you happy and i figured marriage would calm him down some. 

But babe,  you don’t see how he looks at me: like a hungry goat that has fresh yams placed before him.  You don’t see the lechery in his smile when I step into your home to visit you.  Your delusions of utopia make you miss how embarrassed I look when he texts me inappropriate things when all three of us are together. 
And that time, at your little house party last year? He offered to help me get more drinks from the freezer but what I got was help squeezing my bum when I leaned over.  Of course,  the fear won’t let you believe that I slapped him, but he only leered at me and said, “Who do you think she’ll believe? ”
And I could think of nothing else to say because you walked in and he said how much he loved you and you blushed like an idiot and I had to smile like I was retarded…  I tried once, to break it to you, with the old
“I have this friend, ehn,  her husband keeps hitting on her friends and I don’t know if I should tell her or not… ”
And you started to say how probably it was the friends who were hitting on him, and how “these single girls” can be so desperate. Before either of us knew how we got there, you said some things and the segregation came out. 
I had to leave that day because I saw the fear in your eyes, that maybe I wanted your husband, and I was both hurt and embarrassed on your behalf. 
The other day, when I invited you to that new club opening, and you said your husband would be mad if you went so you didn’t go? 
Well,  I went with Jeremy and Sophie and oh, the lies I made up to explain your husband grinding on this girl who looked to be about16, really… The same husband who was supposed to be in Abuja for the weekend,  “on business”.  I told them your marriage was quite liberal and you weren’t feeling too good, anyway… 
But we’ve been through too much and I love you so much.  So this is me, letting your calls go straight to voicemail because I can’t pretend anymore and I won’t be the one to break your heart with the truth. 
But I’ll be here if you need a place to stay, or cry… 
Your desperate single bff.


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